


Smished

by Gilli_ann



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: F/M, Harems, Mildly Dubious Consent, Sexual Humour
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-22
Updated: 2012-06-22
Packaged: 2017-11-08 08:12:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/441087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gilli_ann/pseuds/Gilli_ann
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Arthur and Merlin arrive at the recently vanquished Cenred's castle to take control, and to their surprise discover certain very sensual and determined ladies who definitely aren't easily... <i>controlled</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Smished

**Author's Note:**

> Humorous take on an AU premise of canon AU developments post Season 3. Inspired in part by a scene in "Alexander". 
> 
> Disclaimer: These versions of the legendary characters belong to the BBC and Shine TV. I make no profit and intend no disrespect.

## Smished 

The building had looked austere and forbidding from the outside, though larger than most others in Cenred's capital.

Following watchfully right on Arthur's heels, ever on the outlook for assassins or enemy soldiers carrying a grudge and a weapon to back it up with, Merlin had unthinkingly expected the same sort of interior decor that Cenred's other palaces had offered: Simple wooden structures, a big hearth, an ugly throne, some fur rugs, cold steel in lieu of adornments, and nothing much else.

But this place was something entirely different. It was like walking into another world, - a world of music, colour, scents, heat, lights – and bosoms.

Merlin's eyes widened even as Arthur stopped short. Looking around incredulously he walked right into the prince, earning an elbow to his ribs for his clumsiness.

The sound of water tinkling came from one end, where a marble pool and fountain could be glimpsed. Merlin's eyes widened even further at the sight of the statue above the pool. It looked like a group of women, nude women, contorting their bodies into challenging positions. But was the water really trickling from their....

He quickly directed his glance in another direction, realizing that the artworks on the walls offered no better place to rest his eyes. In fact, they were... positively indecent! He heard Arthur growl at the many eyefuls, and decided that the best course of action was to keep his own eyes fixed on the prince. Arthur was alluring too, especially when walking around shirtless, but at least Merlin was used to that sight. And right now the prince was in full armour – while the women approaching them from every direction were wearing – nothing much at all.

Merlin stared firmly at Arthur's back, his jaw set determinedly.

Rich carpets and lush cushions everywhere made the big room they'd entered glow like the inside of Morgana's big box of jewels. There were wide comfortable benches, and low tables with fruit, sweetmeats and pastries piled high. Crystal glasses and carafes glinted in the sunlight that fell slanting through stained glass windows high on the walls, awash with glorious colours.

And most of all, there were all the women. Many women. Curvaceous women. Dressed in vivid colours, jewels glinting at throats and arms and ankles and tinkling when they moved. They had long flowing hair, red lips, and shimmering dark eyes rimmed in kohl,

They had all stopped whatever they were doing, the last strains of a soft song and harp music hanging in the air still, like the echo of a caress.

“Step back and behave, Merlin,” Arthur hissed. “Don't stare, you idiot! This has to be Cenred's harem. I've heard it mentioned, but it is nothing like I .... “

He cleared his throat.”This must have been the best kept secret in this kingdom, obviously.”

A stately tall woman stepped forward, her long tresses glinting with golden ornaments, and the rich silk dress failing to fully cover any important part of her pale and long-limbed body.

Merlin gulped.

Arthur righted himself, pulling his shoulders back as if facing a foe.

“I am Cenara, mylord Cendred's cousin and first mistress of his harem,” she said in softly modulated tones. “I greet you, Arthur Pendragon. You have vanquished my lord's kingdom. We are all at your command and your disposal, now.”

She dipped down into a deep curtsey, gripping her long silk skirts and pulling them back, simultaneously pushing her chest forward to put her breasts on admirable display. She inclined her dark head slightly, drawing a deep breath and then sobbing quietly once, her long lashes sweeping down over perfectly rounded cheeks. Her bosom heaved beautifully. She was the very image of bountiful distress, in urgent need of strong and virile comfort.

Merlin bit his lip to keep from sniggering nervously.

Arthur stepped forward decisively and bowed slightly, offering her a hand up. “Lady! Have no fear. You will none of you suffer under Camelot's rule.”

His eyes seemed glued to the ample and well-rounded skin on display. “Is there... is there some private room where we may discuss your future undisturbed, mylady?”

Cenara rose with surprising speed and agility, keeping Arthur's hand firmly in hers even after she was back on her feet.

“Oh, indeed there is, my lord. Come with me...”

Merlin took a few steps, following Arthur instinctively, uneasy about letting the prince out of his sight and about remaining behind alone with so many women - with so little fabric to share among them.

“Merlin, stay whee you are!” This was Arthur's sternest voice, though the prince walked right on, still letting himself be guided by Cenara. “Remain here till I return!”

Arthur threw a grin over his shoulder, a wolfish flash of teeth in Merlin's direction. The princely prat's grin, back with a vengeance. “Stay here and guard these ladies from harm. Make yourself useful. That's an order.”

“Y-y-yes, Sire.”

Dithering uncertainly in the middle of the room, intensely aware that a number of scantily-clad women were drawing nearer, Merlin watched Arthur leave with Cenara, the heavy door to an inner boudoir closing behind them.

Suddenly he felt the sun through the windows very keenly, scorchingly hot on his head and shoulders. He was sweating.

The tinkling of the fountain sounded like giggling. There were whispers and soft laughter and sweet music in the air all around.

A plump and pretty woman stepped up to stand right in front of him, placing a hand with amazingly long painted nails on his shoulder. «Do you feel well, my lord?»

«Ehm...»

Another one crowded the first, her hand soothingly curling around Merlin's arm as she stared into his eyes. «Are you the lord regent's next-in-command, my lord?»

«Uhm...»

A third one crowded in with the rest. “Is there any comfort we can offer you, mylord – any refreshments you'd like to partake of?”

“Just say the word, and what you desire shall surely be yours,” the first one added, bumping the two others aside with a few well-placed hip thrusts. Merlin wondered distractedly whether she was a belly dancer, or whether she'd learned those hip thrusts in other ways........?

He swallowed, feeling light-headed.

All three women were tall and shapely, and all had amazingly ample bosoms, barely covered in skimpy, sliding silks. And were those... nipples? Hard and prominent nipples?

Merlin heard himself make a strange little meeping sound. He drew a hand across his damp forehead, his eyes darting back and forth between the voluptuous women of the trio. There was nowhere to retreat to – there were plump limbs and heaving bosoms, full red lips and sparkling eyes everywhere. He was trapped!

“Look,” he heard a lazily enchanting voice whispering to his right somewhere. “I do believe he is blushing! How delightful! And those eyelashes - mmmmmm.”

“Yes, he's a sweetheart, isn't he? Do you think he's an... innocent?”

“Oh, surely not! The prince and his men have the pick of the court ladies!”

“If he's experienced, yet looking like that, there's all the more reason to....”

Merlin gulped. This was bloody ridiculous! There was nothing to be afraid of – no need to remain frozen where he stood. He was the greatest warlock around. He could magic himself out of this easily. He could put the fear of God and Morgana into these lustfully indecent wenches.

Except that the perfumes wafting through the room made his head spin, and the temptingly carnal sights and sounds surrounding him made him so very dizzy...

The hand on his shoulder firmed, pulling him forward decisively even as the woman's smile widened wickedly. He made an involuntary stumbling step, crashing into her ample bosom, and finding to his horror that he was trapped.

“Mmmhhhpp!”

He could not see, could barely breathe, and the woman did not only grip his shoulder now, but also cradled his head, pressing it to her, smishing his face in between her soft and glorious breasts.

Merlin flailed helplessly like a fish on a hook.

“MMMHHHPPP!”

“Oh my lord, that feels so good, yes, do rub up against me like that, please, I do not mind....”

Another pair of hands were groping his bottom. He squirmed, affronted. Really!

Merlin managed to get a grip on the bosom-lady's waist, forcefully pushing her away and freeing himself sufficiently to breathe. He sputtered indignantly.

“Mylady! You forget yourself! I am...”

“...Not interested in her, but in me?” the blonde woman standing next to his assailant asked, and with surprising dexterity hooked an arm under his, swung him around, and smished his face against her heaving, pale bosom even as she lifted her heavy golden necklace out of the way.

At least that got him out of immediate reach of the butt-groper. Small mercies, he reflected in passing.

Shimmering lights, lustrous blond locks, glorious warmth and deep-yellow silks swirled around Merlin. It was like being pressed to the heart of the sun. He actually felt the heartbeat, steady, rapid and strong, as he snuggled into the expanses of skin pushed high by a tight fitted bodice.

“Oh my lord! You feel so good!” she whispered above him.

Dizzy due to lack of air, he fleetingly wondered whether she tasted as deliciously as she smelled. There could be nothing wrong in investigating, could there? He tongued carefully at her skin, licking a small wet streak upwards when she seemed to release her hold on him a fraction. He did it again, with a bolder, broader, wetter stroke. It proved a smart strategy, for she let him go completely, her hands fluttering next to his head as she whispered something unintelligible, and sighed.

He grinned. This was the way to extricate himself from the sticky situation, was it? Kissing and licking and fondling his way to the door? It felt a somewhat daunting task, but not a frightening one.

He released the glowing sun woman and moved on to the next one in line, a cool vision in pale-blue layers of silk. A transparent veil frosted with tiny pearls like ice crystals covered her long brown tresses, her skin was white as snow, and her pink rosebud mouth opened slightly as she inhaled sharply in anticipation.

“Lady?” He inquired politely, arching an eyebrow at her. 

She closed her eyes, held her breath and reached for him blindly. He pulled her up against him, wriggled against her suggestively, and dipped his face into her lovely, lovely cleavage.

She sighed with pleasure. So did he, nosing into the soft warm hollow between her glorious breasts, kissing the fragrant skin and tonguing gently across the blue silk covering a nipple. He blew warm air lightly over the dark wet stain he'd made, watching her immediate reaction in fascination.

He could get used to this. He absolutely _would_ get used to this. He _wanted_ to get used to this. He nibbled at her throat for a moment, sucking hot blood to the surface of her delicate skin, then let his mouth travel upwards, seeking hers.

The ice woman was _melting_. She moaned against his lips, letting him take the reins completely, opening up to him, clinging now as if she was about to swoon.

Exited little whispers and sighs filled the air around him. He was putting on a show. Clearly his audience was rapt.

He felt his pride swell, making joint cause with his cock. He decided to give both free reign.

Oh yes. He could do this. He'd be the master of this art by the time Arthur returned. He'd be the world champion of bosom-squishing, deep kisses and all-round... frottage. (At least he believed that was the right word.)

And skills so diligently acquired should never be let go to waste, he realized with determination.

A new era was dawning at the court of Camelot.


End file.
